A Christmas Gift to Myself

peanutsI decided to get myself a Christmas gift this year.  I haven’t been happy with where I have taken my life.  There are things I want to change and improve.  I haven’t lived my life to its fullest potential everyday.   I can return my new life if I’m unsatisfied for whatever reason.

For three years, I’ve been wanting a better life and I haven’t put most of my energy into it.  I gave it small concentrated efforts that led nowhere.  For the next 90+ days, I’ll be using all my energy to create this Christmas gift for myself.

The first thing I want to do is finally transform my body into an athlete’s body.  I want to be strong, fast and healthy.  Yes,  I run marathons.  The weight is beginning to give me pain.  I want to eliminate the excess weight so my body can focus on becoming a better athlete than just surviving.  I want to be strong enough carry a load more than the typical American.  I want to develop a body that will qualify for the Boston Marathon.  I want a sound body that will carry and nurture a sound mind.

Depression is a beast.  Give it an inch and it’ll be the ruler your world.  I want to have control over it than it controlling me.  It wrecks a lot of things in my life.  There area few things I need to do to manage and eventually triumph over this.  First, I need to I work on developing good habits to get it under control.  I slip into bad habits which become bad thoughts.   I need to develop good resilient habits to replace the bad ones.  Second, I need to learn to deal with my triggers better.  There are triggers all around me at school and at home.  My parent’s home is the worst of them all.  Third, I have to find and maintain the support system.  I haven’t been to a counseling session in over a month and feel the effects of that choice.  I can’t do this alone.  Finally, I need to find time to exercise everyday.  Exercise is St. Michael’s sword I use to fend off thoughts and feelings of anxiety and sadness.

Good healthy habits makes a good healthy life.  Motivation gets me started and healthy good habits keep me going.  They are my tools to create a better life.  It’s going to take baby steps to create these habits.  The first healthy habit I want to develop is keeping my desk clear before I go to sleep and making my bed.  Nothing feels worse than waking up to clutter or coming home to mess.  Each day, I’ll add a new healthy habit.  My healthy habits are loosely based on those found at Flylady.net.  I’ll be modifying them to my needs.

I want to include more in my Christmas gift but I don’t want to do too much that I become overburden an quit.  A sound body, a sound mind, and sound habits combined will make one nice Christmas present.  If I don’t like it, I can always return it and get my old life back.

One Response to “A Christmas Gift to Myself”

  1. My favorite gift to give during Christmas day is a fruit basket with toys and gift certificates. they can really put a smile on someone’s face”*;

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